black-eyed susan

black-eyed-susan-1
fun with a scanner

where have i been? feeling cynical, feeling old and crabby, chalk it up to heat.

a friend of mine recently made the remark that having to go to work every day was an inconvenience. i have been struggling with that notion. i appreciate all the benefits of working – the paycheck, the health benefits, etc., yeah yeah yeah. and it’s not like there are a lot of things i want to do that i can’t because i have to go to work. but it just seems damned inconvenient. maybe it’s just midlife, maybe i need to buy a miata convertiable or find a young lover (neither of which my wife would approve of.)

my son goes off to college in scotland this fall, and my daughter has 3 more years of high school before she heads off into whatever direction she finds. so i tell myself that i have to wait at least that long – which is not very long at all – before i look to re-evaluate my life.

this has nothing, of course, to do with multiple sclerosis. just what is rumbling around in my head these days. my health is a concern, looking into the future. i can get around fine for now, but these fantasies and visions of my future will have to change if my health changes. i think about “accessable” travel, and the security i get from a steady job with steady benfits.

ok, i gotta go look at motorcycles now.

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Author: Stephen

Stephen Harris is a writer, painter and a photographer who lives with his family in Maine.

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