birch trees, gilsand farm

i read in a past volume of my journal a refrain that is, unfortuneately, all too common in those writings, a refrain about transformation, about making sweeping changes in my life – i tend to get very excited about the idea, but it fizzles out and fades away, only to be reborn in another 6 or 8 months.
i think the reason those grand schemes never go anywhere is that they are too grand, too sweeping. so i read last night a passage about how i was reading a book on macrobiotics, and how i wanted to delve into that again (i had been a serious macro in a distant former life), along with several other sweeping changes.
now i am faced with this issue of my health, and i remember a friend, who also has ms, suggested that unstead of worrying about strict diets and such i should just try to be as healthy as i could. so taking that advice, and my own advice to keep breathing (which i dispense to anyone in need of advice), i’m going to begin to delve into macrobiotics – just dabble around the edges, maybe just push deeper into vegetarianism, just inch my way toward an improved diet. i’m already mostly sugar-free, and i’ve cut way back on mindless calories (tho my scale seems stuck on 240), and i’m back to walking almost every day. anywho, if this blog serves as confessional, then i’m putting it out there that i plan to keep the dietary vehicle on this path.
just got a bunch of film back from the lab, negatives i was very excited to see. but they mostly suck, the exposures are off, and the process of scanning them and fiddling with them to get them to look good – it’s too much. i got into shooting digital because i was sick of darkroom work, and this scanning nonsense feels too much like darkroom work. so my goal is to acquire a new digital camera – an olympus e-500 – and stick with that. my birthday is coming soon, so maybe it’s not such an unreachable goal.


Author: stephen

stephen harris is a writer, painter and a photographer who lives with his family in maine.

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