more i hate meds

i’ve been trying, as i’m sure many of us do, to find some way to deal with persistent fatigue. the latest is, essentially, amphetamine, in the form of ritalin. i took one, with no real effect, so i took two another day, and felt all speedy and medicated – which i think is a very unpleasant feeling. i felt the same way with antidepressants – medicated. so the other day i tried just one again, and felt all speedy. those things, like coffee, don’t make you not sleepy, they just keep you from falling asleep. but the real drag is that, at least for me, it seems to take several days before i am back to some semblance of normal sleep patterns. i don’t sleep well as a rule, but getting up at 6 am, and then not being able to fall asleep until 12:30 the following morning, spending a day strugglingto keep my head off the desk, and then probably not sleeping again the next night, ad nauseum, just doesn’t work for me.

so i guess i am back to just learning to live with the fatigue, and saving the speed for times when i really need it.

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